Top Bumper Stickers Seen Around the World

If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive a Little Better

If At First You Don't Succeed... Blame Someone Else and Seek Counseling

If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer

Horn Broken... Watch For Finger

It's Not How You Pick Your Nose, But Where You Put the Booger

You're Just Jealous Because the Voices Are Talking to Me

I Have The Body of a God... Buddha

This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening to Me

So Many Pedestrians—So Little Time

Cleverly Disguised As a Responsible Adult

If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?

The Face Is Familiar But I Can't Quite Remember My Name

Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway

Honk If Anything Falls Off

Cover Me. I'm Changing Lanes

He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost But Miles From the Next Exit

I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits with an Unarmed Person

I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To

Where Are We Going and Why Am I In This Hand Basket?

Fight Crime: Shoot Back!

If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over... [Seen upside-down on a Jeep]

Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed for 35 mph Are Also Timed for 70 mph

Guys: No Shirt, No Service. Gals: No Shirt, No Charge [Reported To Be Seen at a Restaurant]

If Walking Is So Good For You, Then Why Does My Mailman Look Like Jabba the Hutt?

Body By Nautilus; Brain By Mattel

Boldly Going Nowhere

Cat: The Other White Meat

Caution—Driver Legally Blonde!

Don't Be Sexist—Broads Hate That

Heart Attacks... God's Revenge for Eating His Cute Little Animal Friends

Honk If You've Never Seen an Uzi Fired From a Car Window

How Many Roads Must a Man Travel Down Before He Admits He Is Lost?

If You Can't Dazzle Them with Brilliance, Riddle Them with Bullets

Money Isn't Everything, But It Sure Keeps the Kids In Touch

Saw It... Wanted It... Had A Fit... Got It!

My Hockey Mom Can Beat Up Your Soccer Mom

Grow Your Own Dope—Plant a Man

All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets


Vince Shivers

[ As Read on Car Talk ]