SUBRIS: The excessive pride that causes owners of Subarus and other all-wheel-drive cars to drive too fast when it snows.
DYSLEXUSIA: The inability to identify your luxury SUV among all the others in the Whole Foods parking lot.
PRIUS ENVY: Insecurity about the size of your mileage.
VOLVOID: The mysterious place where all the Volvo repair money goes.
MERCEDES BENDS: A painful and potentially debilitating condition triggered by making the monthly payments on an outrageously expensive German car.
JAG__S: A jerk who takes up two parking spaces to protect the paint job on his precious Jaguar.