Sell This!

Jun 04, 2007

RAY: This is a puzzler from corporate America, sent in by Jenny Lubeck a year ago.

Imagine this scene if you will. A group of corporate bigwigs is sitting around a conference table discussing ways of boosting sales of some of their company's products. As you might expect, they debate the merits of several of the time-honored marketing measures, you know, lying, cheating and false advertising. But this day, they were looking for something new, something fresh.

They turned to a young junior exec, recently promoted from the ranks of the janitorial staff, a fellow named Schnurdling. He said, 'Look there's a product that we sell, whose sales, I believe, could be doubled.'

'Oh really?' they said.

'Oh yes. All we need to do is add one word to the directions written on the container. That will do it. '

Now I might add that this product is a common household item, something that lots of us use maybe every single day. And the question is, what could that word be, and what might the product be?
RAY: Louie actually came up with an answer that was different from mine, and my answer and Jennie Lubeck's [who sent in the puzzler] answer are the same. The word is repeat.

TOM: Repeat what?

RAY: Repeat. Like repeat after me, or if it were shampoo it would say, lather, rinse --

TOM: And --

TOM AND RAY: Repeat.

RAY: Aren't you going to use twice as much?

TOM: Yes, you are.

RAY: Louie's word was unisex.

TOM: Oh. Excellent.

RAY: Right, a product originally sold for men or women, now can be sold to everyone, and that would double sales as well. But it's not technically in the instructions, you know.

TOM: Yeah, yeah.

RAY: Anyway, do we have a winner?

TOM: Yeah, we do. The winner this week is Albert Ortiz from Tucson, Arizona. And for having his answer selected at random from among all the correct answers that we got, Albert is going to get a 26-dollar gift certificate to the Shameless Commerce Division at, with which he can get a copy of Why You Should Never Listen to Your Father When It Comes to Cars. I should mention that this CD was created entirely from personal experience.

RAY: Yeah, of our children.

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